Sunday at 6

Yeah I've already used that line here in this journal once before.. but.. ya see. that's the only thing I can think of that describes my Sunday evenings.. The 2 words and 1 number says it all... Pretty much all I can say.. yet it says nothing to no one that it doesn't mean anything to.. Odd.. Today was really different.. The boy went with me.. We had a blast.. Well I did.. not sure if he did.. but it did him good to see where I came from I guess.. makes things easier for when he doesn't really understand some of the kookiness that comes up from time to time.. yeah I'm wierd.. anyway tonight a lot of stuff came out that I had no idea of.. There was a lil alchohol involved.. yeah.. I'm guessing that's why the feelings were a little more forthcoming than usually.. takes away your inhibitions.. *Big Grin* I found out that my mom was with my biological father the night I died as a child... When I say died I mean that my innocence was taken and I was thrown into a world of adulthood.. that I was not prepared for... but yet it happened... Yeah.. It might not mean anything... to anyone else..but to me.. it makes me sicker than anything yet I've known about my parents.. the biological ones... It's such a long long story.. I don't have the time.. or the patience to type it all out.. I know what happened.. how.. when.. the why is still a question.. but this little tidbit of information just throws all of the progress I've made over the last 20 years right down the toilet.. I mean shesh.. haven't these people done enought to me.. just by creating me to begin with? leaving.. not giving a shit.. turning thier back? and then the one night I needed them.. they are out doing it again.. just thank god that no children came from it... Used to I would think... man if someone ever thought of doing that to my baby.. I would hurt them.. badly.. why? because I love him.. because that's what mother's do.. even the animal kingdom takes care of thier own... I am no different.. you hurt my son.. and mother bear is going to hurt you.. Why didn't she love me enough to at least call the police? let someone know? My teachers knew.. I was in the 1st grade.. the same age as my son now.. and I was having sex all night.. and going to school all day with no homework.. sleepy.. hungry.. in the same outfit as the day before ... and yet no one bothered to turn it in? Yeah.. people don't really want to step into the sorta thing that could get thier hands dirty... PEOPLE wake UP!! get your hands dirty.. if nothing comes of it.. then nothing comes of it.. If there's nothing there to find.. fine... BUT do not swallow something because you don't want to get into the middle of it.. these children out here need our protection.. if thier parents are to sorry to help them... we have to.. that's why we have all this crap in the world today.. our children need us.. I needed you... luckily I survived.. I have a little pain left.. and sometimes there's after effects.. a lot.. really.. but... I could have not... don't turn your back on that little girl with the blue eyes and brown curls... Don't walk away from that little blonde haired boy with the dirty clothes... They can't help themselves.. if You don't.. who will? Loveyabye